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Deal with intimidating people

deal with intimidating people-19

The use of power, authority, position and status to intimidate workers into compliance is, at many companies, considered to be one of the most effective of management’s bag of coercive tools.Respect for authority, position and status is fine, but using them to intimidate others into submissive acquiescence is quite another thing.

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We are also beautifully different from one another, too -- which means all of us have some unique value and flavor to add to a conversation or social setting. Here are some reasons why other people should not intimidate you: 1. The fear of others is generated within us, not by the person in question. This may not be easy (actually it is), but it is the only way to avoid the feeling of being chained to an oar of a slave-galley; otherwise known as the corporate world.Fighting Intimidation with Intimidation Over 45 years of business experience gave me a front row seat to observe all the tricks and treats of intimidation in business.Like a Stephen King horror story, intimidation comes at us in many forms and faces.As long as intimidation is going to be part of our lives, we might as well learn how to deal with it, resist it, and even use it. Jordan Belfort, the infamous Wolf of Wall Street, said in his memoir, "I'm insecure and humble, and I embarrass easily... If I had to choose between embarrassment and death, I'd choose death. I really found this to be true on three particular, separate occasions. The third occasion was when I volunteered my number to a cute stranger at a concert in Sydney in 2007.

As a fan, something took over me and I introduced myself to him with little more than a smile, my name and some words of appreciation for his work. Kelsey stood up, asked me about myself, introduced me to his wife and thanked me sincerely from stopping by. She was very warm and chatty and shared her story with me as to how she got started in the culinary business. Most people -- including famous people -- are cool! Sometimes, if you make the first social move and say hello, you might be eradicating two people's nerves. You are giving power to your ego when you worry/overthink. Or as Arianna Huffington calls it, the "obnoxious roommate in your head...

The problem is that intimidation never gets the best out of people.

In fact, this approach is the antithesis of effective leadership and detrimental to any hope of achieving success.

Intimidation cowers the employee in a way that limits their ability to act independently, resulting in wasted time, talent and creative opportunity.

The idea that you can command people to do things because they’re afraid of you makes the use of intimidation a pretty tempting commodity for the weak and insecure manager.

Intimidation in the workplace can be blunt and blatant or it can be subtle and surreptitious.